Roadblock 2

“Just when you think it can’t get any worse, it can.” – Nicholas Sparks

I thought my life this year would go in a straight direction and next year, I’ll be heading to Europe. But here’s life again, throwing rocks at me, creating potholes in the paved road.

Last year, my roadblock was being diagnosed with mitral valve prolapse. This year, I might lose my job for reasons that I cannot control.

A new project at work will be launched soon. This project will require employees to work at night. I have been told many times by my cardiologist that STRESS is my no. 1 enemy. And whenever I stay up late, I get stressed. So, this new undertaking may not be good for my health. With this, I may be forced to:

a. Transfer to another department with normal working hours but the work may not involve copywriting
b. Quit my job

Here’s the thing: If I transfer to another department, I may improve my skills as an employee but if you ask me, I only want to improve my writing and I can’t improve my writing if I go in the direction of let’s say, graphic design or customer service…especially customer service!

Second, I love my current job as a copywriter and I really don’t want to quit now.

However, the night schedule is inevitable. I don’t know what to do at the moment. I cried in front of my bosses because I may have to do something in the future that I don’t want to do.

~~~~

When I arrived home a few hours ago, I checked an old Facebook email exchange with Kim of the So Many Places travel blog.

So Many Places tells the journey of Kim and Brian, an American couple who quit their jobs to travel the world. Kim’s honesty has inspired me so much that I decided to email her for her opinion about going to Europe. This was my question:

“Will you simply save until you reach your European budget or set out on an adventure which will hopefully lead you to Europe?”

Her response was long and very insightful. But these lines stood out the most:

What do you want to do more than anything else? That is the thing that you should do – even if it takes awhile to do it. Only you know what pulls inside of you. That said, if you do set out to travel now- to work and travel throughout Southeast Asia- many, many things will happen to you that you can’t imagine or dream of from where you sit right now.

This urge to take my backpack and head into the unknown has been on my mind since. In fact, when I arrived from my month-long journey last year, I wrote a post about coming home and feeling dislocated because I desperately wanted to get out and find something more worthwhile than working in a corporate setup (you can read about it here).

And I would like to think that this roadblock is the push I need in order to leave… to reach the road I’ve wanted to conquer for so long already. Though I’m not really sure that this is what’s happening at the moment, I feel that there’s a positive side to it.

I want to leave, take my backpack and go wherever the road takes me. The ultimate goal is to reach EUROPE one day. But before that, I hope to start in Southeast Asia or any country nearby then head to the Middle East, reach Turkey then make my way up to Europe. Work will always be involved of course – but it’ll be work that I love (be it writing, working for a hostel, tour guide, or something travel related).

It is risky but I don’t know what else to do with my life. Besides, I don’t want to live the next 40-50 years of my life with regret. I’ve had so much of that already and I don’t want to add more to it.

This plan, if it does happen, will derail my already-set Europe plans next year if you look at it from the financial perspective of course. But who knows?

The future is unknown. Nothing’s carved in stone. Everything is floating in the air. However, I think I am destined for something…I just don’t know what it is yet…and if I don’t get out of the corporate world soon, I may never get it. So I am seeing this transition as a positive thing and I really do hope to find my answers soon.

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3 thoughts on “Roadblock 2

  1. Praying for you Ric! As Paolo Coelho said: “…the truth is that with each step you take, you arrive.”

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